A foolproof way of figuring out which companies you shouldn't work for


Simply follow the steps below:

  1. Decide on a company that you are considering working for.
  2. Start a browser in incognito/private mode.
  3. Go to the said company's website.
  4. View their "Cookie Banner", and select the option that best describes the mess that's their "Cookie Banner":
    1. There is a simple "Accept" and/or "Deny/Accept only essential" option.
    2. The UI is designed to lead you to tap "Accept all" unless it's 9am, you have had your 8 hours of sleep, and have had 3 cups of coffee already.
    3. There is a list of 30 vendors which you have to go through, and manually accept/deny.
    4. You have to scroll for about 25 minutes to get to the Deny button.
    5. You get a multiple choice of performance, marketing, analytics, function, and possibly a few more.
    6. Once you select "Deny", the banner starts showing you a "loading" component that shows their progress in switching off all the cookies.
    7. There is any mention of the word "legitimate interest" anywhere on the cookie banner.
  5. If you have selected option (1), go ahead and explore the company further to see if they may be a good fit for your next adventure.
  6. If you have selected any other option, under no circumstances should you be working for this company. Go back to step 1 and start again.

My favourite by far is (6), what a brilliant user experience.

And my "huh?" award goes to (5), like you want the users to go "yeah, OK, let me really take a moment and decide which cookies I want to allow: "Marketing cookies? yeah, go on then you can harvest my data, but functional cookies? No I don't think I want those, thank you."

I honestly don't get why you have to be so mean to your users.


p.s. a great example of number (6) from Cloudera:

Just a brilliant user experience in www.cloudera.com
A somewhat sensible example of number (1): This should really be all you need